Tags
affair, asshole, betrayed, betrayed spouse, cheater, cheating husband, Christchurch, co-worker, colleagues, couple, fucker, husband, insurance, Marsh, New Zealand, office, sex, whore, wife
I was catching up on the news of the day online last night when I noticed one of the top stories was ‘Christchurch office sex caught on camera from busy bar across the road’.
Today, 12 hours later, it’s still the top story by far on news.com.au. It has four times as many readers as the next story down.
So here’s the gist: a man and woman were having sex in an office, after hours, last Friday night. The entire scene was clearly visible from a busy pub across the street. (The pair likely thought the tinted office windows would prevent anyone from seeing in.) Naturally, pub patrons were captivated by this free porn show and photographed it endlessly. Photos of the pair went viral.
The problem: he’s married, she’s engaged. The two are work colleagues at Marsh, a very respectable New Zealand insurance company. Various reports have him as a senior manager in his 50s (looks younger to me), and she in her early 20s. She is possibly his secretary, according to one report.
The story goes on to say that the wife of the married man is no longer speaking to him and has been “crying non-stop”. They also have children.
We don’t know much about the female, except that “her Facebook page has been deleted”, according to a statement by Marsh, which is also investigating disciplinary action against the pair.
Apparently, neither have turned up to work this week.
This story brought up many feelings and questions for me.
Q. What the fuck makes this news exactly?
A. People with mobile phones who can capture it, then easily distribute it. The illicit sex angle. The affair angle.
Q. What must the wife be going though?
A. Sadly, too many of us will have some inkling of what she’s going through. Unlike most of us, however, our husbands’ affairs weren’t splashed across the world’s media. Some betrayed spouses have not told one living, breathing soul about their husband’s affair, outside of the blogosphere. This wife will never have to wonder what the two did together. It’s all there, captured from many, many angles.
Q. Would most men take advantage if they were in a similar situation?
A. Knowing what I now know, I’d say yes. Office affairs are insidious. Sneaky. Stealthy. Cunning. Deceitful. And unless one of the involved parties leaves, the threat remains.
Q. Is it right for the pub patrons / world’s media / bloggers to publish pictures of the pair?
A. They knew what they were doing. I have no problem outing cheaters.
Whores. Both of them.
If anyone wants to read the full story, you can find it here.
Shattered By My Husband's Affair 
Dirty filthy lying cheaters. Whores is an understatement!!! Feel bad for the wife and fiance. Not only have been publicly huniliated but add a broken heart to that, I would so just want to die!!! Its not bad enough its out there for everybody to see but that visual of them together will not ever go away. Cheaters are such fuckers!!!
Glad I chose to move on w/my life! Because those kinds of ppl have no fucking idea how it feels to be on the other end of the spectrum and will use every excuse to blame their partner or grovel like snivelling cowards that “they are soooo fucking sorry” BULLSHIT, they are only sorry when they get caught
I am so glad they got publicly humiliated and I hope their victims are glad too one day, its whT they deserved. I wish my husband plus whore OW had been caught when they had sex in our car and I would be glad if it had gone viral. Exposure is the best treatment and this takes it to a whole other level. I feel for the betrayeds, at least the fiance can get out now, the wife with kids is not so lucky 😦
Yep. You gotta wonder at the entitlement here, ME, ME, ME – after all it is a city office, the lights were on. There was a bar right THERE. Idiots. But of course they are, goes without saying. Like you, SW, and probably most BSs, my immediate thoughts (when this hit the “news” – even before it was confirmed it was an affair – like office sex, what else would it be likely to be) were for whomever was getting hurt here. Bastards. They are likely to end up dining out on their “funny story” one day, whereas the poor betrayeds are just utterly wiped out.
idiots…
i rarely catch the news, i cancelled sky tv a year or so ago because i didnt like random things popping up and setting me off heh. but oh hello, a random day i happen to click to the herald…
im dying to ask him tho… what do u think of those fools from chch? he will take it like im rubbing his nose in it… which i would be… i feel so sorry for the wife… this is such a small country for that sort of thing to go so public in… i wouldnt be surprised if she heads over your way…
our mayor (auckland) got his ass caught a while back… thats news of course, because politicians failing just is… look it up, her pics are *gag*… and imo she was old enough to know better… she tried to claim she just ‘fell in love’ but zzz, you only get a pass with that if youre young… the worst thing about it is his wife had been very very ill… ugh. sick.
You never know, she may end up letting him stay…. SWxo
he better be damn good with the apologies then!
i wonder if the girl has some perspective on it with a view like this… omg i look like such a whore! heh.
LOL, whores rarely have ANY such perspective. I read today she was an office junior. I bet the affair’s been going on for a while – no-one wears ultra sexy underwear like that unless they know somebody else is going to be taking it off them later… 🙂
I searched my ex-wifes laptop when my suspicion chip went into overdrive and found two videos and some photos on there I’d rather have not seen. So I didn’t need to imagine what they were getting up to.
I feel for both of the betrayed people here.
I am glad they were publicly humiliated too. I just feel bad for the wife and the fiance. They now have an actual visual of their spouse in the act. With me, I only have my imagination to deal with and that’s bad enough.
I think affairs are one of those things that people will always be interested in and gossip about because it makes them feel better about their own situation. Like, ” maybe my marriage feels a little boring but at least I’m not being cheated on like her!”
In this case, I think the blatant disregard for any and everything around this couple of cheaters would have been fascinating for anyone watching. Of course, there was no way for the bar patrons to know for sure that they were witnessing an act of adultery, they just enjoyed the show. The poor wife and fiancé, what a nightmare!
I wonder if the cheating man willl leave his wife and kids or if he is capable of remorse and repair (and if his BW will let him).
The woman’s fiance is best advised to run while he still can. He’s the lucky guy in all this, hurt though I’m sure he is. He can get out, he’s probably young, he hopefully can find someone who will love him and not betray his trust and love (in private or in public!).
I wonder if the betrayed wife will ALLOW her cheating husband to stay, if he says he wants to. Afterall, plenty of us still stayed with our husbands after they cheated on us. Big difference here is that the wife will feel humiliation on a much grander scale, even though HE’S the one that should feel humiliation, not HER. Who knows how this will pan out… SWxo
I just feel for both of the betrayed people. I don’t wish those awful times of despair, shock and humiliation on anyone. It is unbearable.
One day the wife at least might be glad the whore had her face plastered on the news. I say the wife because the fiance seems to have cut and run so he will move on faster . Though it was sad to see the article quoting him that she was “a lovely person” and it was her “first mistake”. She looked pretty well practised and no one that lovely cheats. Honestly, if Argyrodes had her arse on the news even with my husband I would not be humiliated. They would be, whether she felt it or not. He would, but i have the perspective of his years of remorse now. I hope the wife can see it that way. This is their shame (or shamelessness) not hers.
I agree my husband ap—-her husband told everybody!! Made it out like it was all my husband fault like she was the innocent victim!! i asked him not to tell the world about what happened! What about my children what about me its bad enough going threw what he did to us but now its worse everyone knowing!!!! I know that people only know what he wants them to think but it still makes it that much harder for us to heal. I DONT KNOW SO MANY LAYERS OF HURT AND LIES AND THEN HIM JUST RUNNING HIS MOUTH! WHY WOULD HE DO THIS!
The manager really learnt a lesson in an expensive way. Many of financial and HR practitioners including myself are shaking heads over this and this will become a case study sooner or later. My heart goes to his wife and children.
The whore is really a slut as it is obvious from the start that it was not the first time from the way they behave. And I was kinda appalled to see that she has a nightdress which we don’t even bring to work PLUS a bottle of wine to drink after the sickening act.
We will be watching on the next step on what the management is taking. It is no joke when people type the said company’s name meaning to search for quotation or information, the first thing they will see the sex romp splashing and on the top of list. It is damaging to the company’s image in fact.
If the betraying spouse stays on with his wife, it would be good as his wife will be his beacon of hope in the mess until it blows over.
If the betraying spouse decides to walk out, it will be definitely out in the media. And his career may be over and even if he stays on with the co, his promotion is bye bye.
The title whore will stay with this amorous couple for years until the judgement day.
It’s completely fucking disgusting. Clearly it’s not the first time – that is soooo obvious! Anyone want to take bets that she knew he was married…with kids! What are these whores thinking? That he’ll just drop his life and go to her, a little schoolgirl?? Nine times out of 10, no way. Did she think she was special? A little slut who opens her legs for married men is a whore for sure. The reputation of the company is in tatters; they should fire them, then sue for bringing their name into disrepute! This whole thing makes me just so fucking MAD!
It IS sickening. Obviously a planned hook-up and not their first. And in typical OW style I’m sure she didn’t give a flying fk about the wife and kids she knew he had at home. I guess if he could disregard and disrespect them then she’d have no qualms either. It takes a special kind of selfish to pull off an affair. I think it’s safe to say neither of them gave a fk about what they were doing until they made the news. Probably didn’t see it for the pathetic cliche it is either and thought they had made a ‘connection’ with each other. Yuck. Cheaters are so good at lying themselves into believing their situation is so special and unique and it’s so deluded and gross. What’s also cruel is one of the guys who took pics thought it was sooo funny, even after the story of it being an affair and the wife finding out on fb came out. Like, really?!? Doubt he’d feel the same if it was his wife and the mother of his kids in the picture.
In case anyone is still following this sorry saga, here’s the latest: he is a senior broker in his 40s, he has two children, the 20-year old junior whore slut had actually split from her fiance before this incident . I note also, that the New Zealand Herald is blaming the PUB PATRONS for this fiasco, saying the incident deserved to be kept private. What a fucking joke.
Unbeknownst to them (they were busy ‘caught up in the moment’) someone took cellphone pics of my husband screwing his ho-worker in a secluded spot one morning. They got forwarded around in a ‘ha-ha guess what I saw when I was walking the dog this morning’ kinda way. Ya, it’s fking hilarious asshole. I have no idea how many people the pics got sent to but I’ve heard at least a dozen, so who knows? I’ve got no control over how many people have or will see them. The ONLY reason this bothers me is MY KIDS. Other peoples’ opinions on the pictures don’t matter to me, but my babies DO matter. He and her were consenting adults. Fked up decision makers, but adults who risked and got caught. I still don’t know what I’d do if any one of my kids ever saw that shit. My sitch with the pics is not on this Herald story scale BUT I can imagine cheating douche-bags’ wifes’ horror right now. How devastating for her to be confronted with his affair this way. All over fb and newspapers like it’s some fking joke. An international story. My heart breaks for her and her children, her son and daughter are old enough to have social media accounts, read the paper and almost certainly have friends who will too..so chances are they’ve probably seen the images of their dad and his co-worker aka ‘ass-on-the-side’ when everybody else did. That sucks. I hope their mum had an opportunity to protect and/or prepare them for the fact that the pics are out there, but maybe she didn’t. Maybe they saw them. What a fking NIGHTMARE for them all. I agree with outing affairs for the benefit of giving the spouses’/partners of the cheaters the information so they can decide what they want to do with it, but OMG I don’t think it needs to be news like in this case. Fk affairs;(
Are you still with your husband? SWxo
Yes we’re still together. But honestly SW, I do walk the line between moving on with him and moving on withOUT him still.
I was doing well with my personal healing but I think I’ve hit a plateau. I feel drained physically and emotionally. Just SO exhausted which makes me slightly ‘blah’ lately. I was 100% commited to our marriage BEFORE he decided to cheat and WHILE he was cheating and it seems fked that the same commitment is required of me now to build it back up again. If I don’t want to divorce him that’s just how it is I guess. I just need some days when my energy and focus is spent on things other than how to stay married to my husband. When the mind movies and triggers are on mute for a while. My 1 year D-day antiversary is next week so maybe that has something to do with how I’m feeling, I don’t know. Ok..I just read this through and it’s a rambling mess! I’m sorry. It felt good to write though so I’ll attempt to post anyway.
Wow. This brings up some sick triggers for me as my husband fucked his secretary in his office for 2 or 3 months (he can’t remember how many times… it was SO long ago… ). My husband’s whore did not look like that one though. Man I feel for the wife. It is difficult enough as it is, but bouncing back from this kind of public humiliation, just wow. Of course it is not her fault and she should not feel humiliated, but we all know what “society” thinks about the cheated on wife. I wish my husband had been outed years ago with the secretary. It might have saved me from being stalked by his next whore. 😦
I still can’t help Googling this story every few days to see if there have been any developments. The pain and humiliation that poor wife must be going through…I want to cry for her. SWxo
Really weird conversation with my husband last night about this. I had just read your post and was going to tell him about it while I was preparing dinner. He cut me off mid-sentence and said “yeah, you already told me about that… a bunch of people in a pub across the street video taped it.” I said, “no” I JUST read about this so there was no way I could have told you. He actually insinuated that I was going a little crazy. That I had told him a few days ago and forgotten about it. I said, NO, I had not. It was weird, like he was gas lighting me or something. I was pissed that he was insinuating that I was sort of losing my mind, forgetting something as simple as that. I am OCD and have a great memory and he is not normally that much of an asshole. Anyway, he came in later and said he had heard about it on national public radio and then they had discussed it at one his “meetings” last week. He has such a hard time “remembering” when it has anything to do with some guy getting caught with his pants down. I just looked at him and said, “you are an asshole.” And that was the end of that as I didn’t want to discuss it anymore. But anyway, I do feel so bad for the wife. It’s hard to bounce back from that. I hope she is doing okay…
Here’s the latest (which isn’t much): the cheating husband is “fighting tooth and nail” to keep his job. Good fucking luck with that. Wife and children haven’t been home since “the incident”.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2954227/Married-insurance-boss-caught-steamy-romp-office-junior-fighting-desperately-job-neighbours-reveal-wife-kids-not-home-incident.html
I rather have him fighting for his wife and children than his job. I guess his ego and pride are built on his job and they end with his moments of folly.
My heart goes to his wife and children who moved out. I wish the slut’s name be revealed so that all HR personnel will take note.
Feel so bad for the wife. It’s a long road from the initial shock, betrayal, and humiliation to truly understanding a cheating spouse’s behavior is a reflection on THEM, not you. I wish her well and will keep her in my thoughts. If she only knew how many of us are carrying her around in our hearts.
If the whore is anything like my husband’s, she won’t believe she did a thing wrong. I hope they are both sacked. That will likely be their only regret. I have to say, karma was brutal on this one, and justly so. Dead on – no one wears undies like that unless they’re sure they will be seen by someone they’re seducing. She’s a pro. The ex-fiancé might not be a good judge of character if he thinks she’s a lovely person. Maybe his opinion has since changed.
I feel that it is the best that the adulterous couple be shown the door to end the saga and to set the proper order across all the corporate offices. I am truly surprised that there was no CCTV in the insurance company unless the couple switch off the cctv or know where the cctv are located.
I agree with Donna. When I first read the news, my first reaction was “what will the wife and children react?” followed by what will the boss’s response be
As for the whore, I wish I can send a carton of stinking eggs and drop on the whore.
I have told my H about the news and my wishes. His reaction? He squirmed and wisely kept quiet.
This news has been circulated among my masters course mates. Most of their reactions are “will they be sacked? If they are in my country, they are more likely sacked and they can forget about finding jobs here”
DAMN! Talk about crazy! I’m with you though… Their problem as cheating bastards.
I often think of Hilary Clinton or Eliot Spitzer’s wife, etc because it really must be awful to have your spouse’s indiscretions blasted everywhere. And then be judged for it! The experience is terrible enough but to be dissected on the media??? No thanks…
UPDATE 7 March 2015: Both parties have now been fired and are no longer with the insurance firm, according to the New Zealand Herald, which also claimed “it was not the first encounter between the 50-year-old married senior manager at Marsh Ltd and the English-born 25-year-old woman.”
No kidding it wasn’t the first encounter – you don’t wear underwear like that unless you KNOW someone’s going to be seeing it / enjoying it / removing it.
No word on the wife, but we’re told the whore is not proud of herself (WOW!) And wants to cut ties with everyone she knows.
Wanting to be alone pretty much describes what a betrayed spouse goes through after discovering an affair, too.
Seems the newly unemployed duo are bound by confidentiality agreements in whatever arrangement they came to with their former employer, but I’m sure this isn’t the last we’ll hear of this.
This made me smile. They got what they deserve and will now have to live with the shame, embarrassment and guilt forever. Sucked in. No sympathy. Only feel sorry for the innocent parties.
You’re pathetic. A woman can wear WHATEVER underwear she wants. It is in NO way an indication of whether or not she wants to or will be engaging in sexual intercourse. That attitude it rape culture exemplified. You have referred to this woman as a whore multiple times on this page, but not the man. You have a lot of unresolved anger towards the woman your husband left you for, and your are taking it out on the woman involved in this ‘news’ despite the fact that it has zero relevance to your situation. If you care so much about the wife and kids you wouldnt be reposting the pictures. Pathetic.
“It was not the first encounter between the 50-year-old married senior manager at Marsh Ltd and the English-born 25-year-old woman”
I nearly threw up when I saw that phrase. I think the whore is the one who makes the first move.
I can’t fathom what the “blind” fiance said that it was the only mistake when it was proven that it was not first encounter. Seems that the fiance was also played out.
Lulu, I agree. They are burnt at both ends.
My heart goes to the manager’s family. They are the ones who suffer the most – people whispering behind their backs, pointing at them, sending pity/sympathizing eyes etc.
Regardless of who made the first move, the other person said YES.
They can both eat shit.
Update!!!
The whore has fled to UK.
http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/relationships/christchurch-marsh-ltd-employee-videoed-having-sex-with-senior-colleague-flies-home-to-uk/story-fnet09p2-1227286227348
But I wonder why she is not named.
*sigh*
Ha, I was about to post that myself! : ) I love the comments say “leave her alone” etc. No fucking chance of that! SWxo